Charlie Watts and a demand for respect

A well-known incident happened when Charlie Watts, the drummer of Rolling Stones, clocked Mick Jagger, one of the founding members of Rolling Stones, simply due to disrespect hurled by a drunk/high Jagger. Wikipedia puts it as:"... An intoxicated Jagger phoned Watts' hotel room in the middle of the night asking "Where's my drummer?". Watts reportedly got up, shaved, dressed in a suit, put on a tie and freshly shined shoes, descended the stairs, and punched Jagger in the face, saying: "Don't ever call me your drummer again. You're my fucking singer!"

This gets me thinking, heres a man who was silent for most part of his life, atleast as compared to the more outspoken members of the band, but carried the aura which demanded respect at the utmost level, while holding his fort no matter what.

Now, apply the same conditions to an ordinary joe's life, atleast in this city/country, who works for an organization through out most of his life. And during his entire work span, he is subjected to various events which targets directly his self-esteem, and the respect that he is entitled to. Forget the pay he gets, or the perks and whatever. But yet, it is passed upon us, and the coming generations, to keep our cool or stay mum about it in the light of "job security" or a "stable life". My question here is HOW can one have a stable life knowing he is not respected for the effort he makes every day just to cope up with the daily bull shit. And whoever has worked in this country, would know and agree, that theres always ALOT of bull shit tied to ones work.

Where is that point where a man dresses up, goes upto his boss, and if not smack the living lights out of him, and say: I put you there, you are not my boss by your choice, I made you MY boss.

Or if anything, where would he draw a line saying well this is it, fuck job security and whatever you may, I demand an apology and I demand the respect I am entitled to.

So is it implied, that job security more important as compared to a person's respect, at the end of the day? Is asking for respect and a fair treatment that tabboo to ask? I wonder..

Rant: Thank you for shit

I am grateful. I am thankful.

But not for blessings I got, but for the troub

le I find myself in. For whatever blessings I got, they could never have helped me be someone I am today, and this quickly. Thus, I shall be a brat and be thankful for those at a later date.

I am thankful for the haters, and more importantly, the lovers for throwing irrational arguments in my face, for throwing shit at me whenever I could do with some support. I am thankful for the millions of times I was made to stand at the end of a

smoking gun, and force me to make horrible decisions in milliseconds. I am thankful for the shit I got from everyone for being who I am.

For, had those hurdles not been in my life, I would not have ended up being this comfortable with my own self, and thinking I am awesome. Yes, I am arrogant about it - humble did not do well for me.

For, had these problems not been thrown in my face, I would have not found the off switch for my brains. The ability to turn my mind off, in situations which were non-pleasurable.

For, had not for these people who were not so nice

, I would have never seen the difference between me and them. The difference of bad from the good. The difference of being influential and from being destructive.

I am happy, for somewhere deep down I had a thirst for pain and agony, and whatever is thrown my way, it ends up just increasing the thirst more and more, to the point where now I am constantly waiting for the next trouble people land me into.

Ernesto Che Guevara said "it’s a sad thing to not ha

ve friends, but its worse when you don't have enemies". And in light of this, I shall just say I am blessed to probably have more enemies than friends.

Thank you world, I mean it.

R.

Terrorists are cheap Casio lovers.

Ok, I have always been a geek when it comes to watches; pocket or wrist. I have a firm belief that watches give an insight to their owner faster than anything. Some people suggest that to understand a person, you should look at that person's apparel and how he/she dresses? I say that, all, is very complicated. Look at the watch - thats the key.

So, a news piece caught my eyes yesterday where it said that Terrorists have been linked to their watches, some cheap black rubber casio, costing under $4 at max, leading to imprisonment of several known and not known terrorists. Now this gets me thinking - what kind of a shitty terrorist spends less than $4 on a watch?! I mean come on! How cheap can you be? You guys want to blow up the world, yet you are so cheap that you can't really buy a Guess at the very least?

But again, had they worn such classy watches, like Bvlgari or Guess or even a Timex, i expect things would not have been this scary to look at. 'Cause heres my point, you cannot pull of a Bvlgari on a pair of black dirty shalwaar kameez stitched like a fucking camp shelter - you need a proper suit. And some hand stitched leather shoes, from Italy perhaps. And that would've been a sight. Terrorists coming like James Bond, and instead of saying "The name's Bond, James Bond 007" - they would say "terrorist, 786". BOOM.

Then again, what pisses me off the most is, this whole 19 or 20 years of my life I saw movies and dramas and shit like that, where the villain was always dressed to kill, alongside an amazing watch. Never, not even once, it crossed my mind or TV screen that there are cheap villains. They always drove a BMW or a Mercedes, and wore a matching Tag or Gucci or something with it.

And then I saw the desi militants. Sitting on donkeys, wearing a tent for shalwaar kameez, and a $4 Casio for a watch. Like one said, it's hard to maintain a sense of style.

Technology Detox

And no, i don't mean detox through medical means. I cant find a better suiting word, thus i ll stick to this.
What has been going on, that I was blessed to see, was a complete takeover of my life by my tech gizmos - namely my 2 cell phones and my laptop. And no, i am not referring to facebook. I have been over that "partial addiction" last year, when i went rogue and deleted my account - now its only in place for business use.
I am referring to the situation where I am constantly wired to the internet, my emails, the annoying stupid text messages that i don't know why i keep replying to, and tiny things like that - which in the bigger picture has really screwed my life over. My sleep was demented, i kept waking up in the middle of the night because of some stupid fat head's "whatsup" or the network connection's evil message of telling me how i can change my ring tone for a slight fortune. I became a mummy, quite literally. My food intake went down, my attention span went really low, i became all trippy and jumpy - just like a drug addict.
This may be hypocritical of me to condemn these things, as i sell the annoying tools during the day. But, it doesn't mean that i cannot complain about how it has messed everyone over.

So since a few days, i have started this process of technological detoxification - where after 11 pm i close both my cellphones(all hail blackberry for the auto shut and auto open option), shut down my laptop and plug it out so that i don't wake up in the night and try to open it again, keep the cellphones and laptop in a corner of the room, shut the room lights off so i cant unknowingly fire those things up again, and go into my peace full routine of reading a book or watch a lame movie on the TV.
Apart from this, i have almost stopped replying to messages containing the words: "whatsap" or "hey man, long time". Only replying to ones which are related to my work - cause i cant really NOT reply to my boss's message and still retain my job. BUT, my biggest chunk of gossip messages has died, thankfully.
And all this has brought so much joy to my life, that i might not be able to explain through words, but through my facial expressions - which is something like "YAY :0".
What I'm looking forward to do now, is what Dr.Ghazala(a friend at T2F) once told me to do - take an entire day off. Shut off the cellphone, head to a beach, and just sit there like a dumb bell for the longest time. Before, this sounded like a waste of time, and why the hell would i do that. But now, after the semi detox process, it has started to sound like a complete joy.
Now i wont really preach everyone to do this, whatever i am doing. Yet it still is something i will tell everyone to try it for a few days. The first day is always horrible, but the second day starts to be the most relaxing day/night you ever had in your life.
And the week after the first day - you hit radio silence heaven, and you discover your actual self with complete authority and no strings attached. You fall in love with your own self.

In the memory of my nani...

* i can go on forever talking about my grandma's coolness. I accept this fact even before deciding how i will be writing this piece of blog. There are just a gazillion stories and thoughts swimming around in my mind that i would love to put it out there. But well, I'll just let my keyboard and brain take it from here..

The simplest way of putting whatever happened will have to be: it was a tremendous loss, one which might be just impossible to get over from. She was an angel - a goddess in my life. For the majority of my childhood she, along with my nana, raised me, as they happened to live right opposite my house and my parents used to be off to their work places. My version of kiddy time around my grandparents revolved around getting to use calligraphic pens or learning how to engrave in a piece of cardboard. My memory of bed time stories, narrated to me by my grand ma, involved Baba Bulleh Shah and Quaid-e-Azam, while fictional characters never existed to me for the longest time. Once, she told me - he is smart who reads about others' lives, and learns from their mistakes. Something which I can never forget, something through which I have learnt the most important lessons of my life. But, in short, it was just the best childhood one could ever get, and I'm really blessed to have that, and to know those stand up personalities in person.
I still remember, when I finally started doing something with my life - going places, starting up businesses, doing a shit load of work, every tiny achievement - I would tell her. And she would just sit there, on her favourite seat with her ear piece on, smiling in the most adorable way possible - while saying stuff like "abhi bohut agey jana hai tumhein(you still have a long way to go)". That look of satisfaction made it feel like it was all worth it, and that the world cant do me any harm.
Now, I have no idea how to deal with the loss - but from what i know, shes kicking back in the heavens with nana right now, having a ball, looking down at us beaming with immense pride, thinking Bulleh Shah was a risky venture for bed time stories, but it paid off in the right ways.


Dedicated to the memory of the best grandma.
You're missed nani. No one can fill your seat.
God Bless.


*this blog is merely one of many which will be coming. Abrupt as this may be, it is just a start.

It was meant to be a one man show.

The veins turn ice cold,
time decides to stand still,
a haze descends on the vision,
and the people start to disappear.

The mind starts doing backflips,
the emotions wash off,
nothing matters now.

The spotlight blinds the vision,
and realisation dawns -
its only me on the stage,
time to roll the one man show credits.

*mind blabbers - blog publishes it. cruelty at its best.

Jungle rule?

So i am struck by a very strange situation - a total void of any human emotions. It has been bugging me since quiet some time, but as i slowly start to write about it, i come to peace with it.
Since a few days, i have stopped feeling any emotions - at least not the good ones, i still feel the happiness of certain things, but generally its in the category of "indifference". Care is something i have forgotten, precaution is to the wind - and to point out something which makes this ironic is: i was always the guy particular about everything, analysing any risk a billion times if i was to embark on something which was generally frowned upon let alone be even remotely illegal. Friends, i hate to admit, are losing worth. I'm told its the arrogance kicking in, its the head fogging up with fucked up ideas. But, i politely refuse - i can think sense at times as well.
The word "friend" is now merely a simpler word for "acquaintance". Old ones - well, they have done their part in screwing my life one way or the other and in the process ensuring i never even think of them once in the future days. I hate to admit now though, i have screwed up - over the years I have become almost completely self sufficient(emotionally/socially, if not financial), being alone isn't a scary thought anymore, on the contrary its quiet appealing now. I have screwed up in the sense that a few years back i was compared to a stone (emotionally) and although I rejected that idea back then, over the time i have some how evolved into one.
"Indifferent" may be the word, but an expression will go something like how a friend neatly summed it up today, unknowing of my inner battle:

"its like an empty jungle man, and you are apparently the king"

ahh well - alot of bull shit has been covered i suppose. "suit up" is the thing to do now i think - Barney Stinson was indeed right, life is pretty awesome this way.

Airport security - safety for some, strip show for some

This fellow was left semi nude in the lobby of Jinnah Airport, after the metal detector beeped 'cause of metal buttons in his kurta. Must be messaging his family: "raped, dont expect me home tonight".

Reconnecting - old comrades

Its funny, actually, how we end up meeting people from our pasts un-expectedly. And by meeting I mean a physical interaction or merely chatting up through a few ridiculous texts. I had one of those days when a lot of people from your past come out in front of you at once, and it’s like a pleasant blur. Be it the ex fellow students, at a hotel, that I ran into when I went to have lunch, or talking to an ex-friend through SMS like it was 2004 again and the time when everything was suddenly all "electric", or chatting up shit with one of your old teacher.

It brings me to one pressing thought, the sense of how much people have changed, how much I, as a person, have changed over this time. But then there’s this thing which amazes me more, it’s that no matter how much people change, a few things remain constant in them. A prime example would be my want of a private jet, ever since I was 15, when I saw this actor dude hitching a plane with a rock star in some movie. The exciting thing was I told a certain someone, who I was talking to after a very long time, I still want a plane, and she flipped over the fact that I STILL want that. It is ridiculous, this wish of mine, I should clearly accept. But just maybe, it’s that thing in me which reminds me of who I was, and how much I have changed over this time. Maybe, the wish is just an anchor point of the past. Mind dwells on countless explanations. I shall repeat though, I still want a private jet. Black in color, with a matching Lamborghini. Donations are welcomed, in pretty much any form.

Another "reconnecting" event of the day, worth to be repeated, is that this teacher of mine, who taught me 2 years back, called - to tell me lecole is starting its ACCA program again. Fun was the fact that we actually bitched for half an hour about how the students of other schools are not sane enough to be... well, humans. And by human I mean a general yet bearable personality bearing person.

It’s amazing how human changes over time. Even more amazing is the fact that no matter how much they change, they somehow stay the same. All I’m trying to say here is its fun talking with old comrades after a long time. It reminded me the reason I have a sore ass, I kept sitting on nails.

PHET effect - on the streets and at the hotel

I sit in the lounge of Regent Plaza, a somewhat known hotel to me, waiting for my room to get ready. My sister has an exam in an hour. It’s pouring madly outside. CFA people didn’t find it in their interest to postpone the paper. Thus after a hurried session of packing my valuables, jamming in the car, and hitting the road at break neck speed, we arrive at Regent.

Now you may be thinking, why did we shift to this hotel, what about the house? Well, the house, after much tear and sweat was sealed against rain water the whole day yesterday, but the seal didn’t match the wrath of the rain. When it started to rain last night, around 2 AM, the house was in waters within an hour. Specially my room. It became a mini pond. Rest of the rooms were relatively dry. Ironic for this to happen to someone who is water phobic?

So well, the whole night was spent awake, with me and my dad manually trying to throw the water out as much as we could and seal the places with cement and plaster. It was useless, as it turned out. The water was one tough opponent, always finding ways to get in. I tried countless strategies of the Need for Speed game, to think of ways how difficult is this challenge, and how difficult the next challenge will be?

And while waiting in the lobby, I meet a student, waiting for her turn to come so she can go in the exam room. She’s scared for her exam, yet she is more scared about how it’s going to be when she comes out, how far will her house be under the waters? I shudder to think the condition of my house right now. Probably a nesting place for fishes?

Now the truth is: I have no idea how it’s going to turn out now. I’m now in the refuge of a hotel, which of course is un-safe in this country, my room is still not ready, and it will take half an hour more. My sister’s paper starts in an hour. God help us all. I don’t want to drown.

PHET- up

Right now, as i write, its starting to rain outside. I put all my phones on charge, tell the people of the house to do the same. Get the torches out, and clean the generator. My sister is sleeping right now behind me, she has a paper tommorow. I just hope she wakes up to a dry sunny day.
I write this, to summarise the fiasco happening in my life in the past couple of days due to this cyclone PHET. Ever since it has started, just a couple o days back, life in karachi for me has been somewhat crippled. Different channels giving different reports, different websites giving their own little views on how its going to struck karachi.
My mom has been the worst hit uptil now i suppose. She has been worried like PHET is going to come right upto our house and knock on our door and ask for a shower. All the sms she recieves are automatically repeated at the maximum volume to the entire house, all the website reports are saved and emailed to everyone. She even has made a contingent plan of shifting to a hotel, which is apparently the only place where the cyclone wont be planning to go. When this is all over, and i hope it is really soon, she will be the one who feels the most relieved i suppose.
So well, starting off BBC has been a giant pain in the arse about this. Last night it predicted clear skies, and well, it rained bullocks over my house. Clear skies? My ass! Weather.com/yahoo weather has been predicting thunderstorms every hour, and today the whole day it predicted the same, when the sun was out and i was drenched in sweat getting my house sealed from the expected water. The dilemma is, who to believe here?
Which brings me to a whole different news, urgent house restructuring took place today. In a span of 2 hours, the house was made somewhat waterproof. The water tank raised, the entrance doors of the ground floor recieved bricks and cement, to make sure no water creeps in (like the last time it rained, and there was 2ft of water inside the house), the windows sealed with this silicone stuff, and sand dunes being made on all open spots. Oh and the cars got these black pipes on their asses to stop the water from going up its holes. Funny much i suppose.
This cyclone PHET is seriously getting on my nerves. Im tired of friends sms-ing me to tell me how fun it was for them to know me, how its time they drown and die, or sms-ing stuff like take care, stay on high grounds and blah blah. I may be the most care-free person about PHET right now, i dont care if it hits or not. If it does, bad luck, we gotta suck up and live with it. If not, we still get a shit load of rain to face, and well.. suck up.
All i care about is that i got a paper on thursday. And BBC predicts a sunny day. God help me!

Justice - a state of mind

Past few events have left me wondering. Justice is a state of mind now, and probably left as a myth. It is now much alike the tooth fairy.
Guardians of justice, the lawyers, are day after day being blamed for being corrupted. And sure, some of these accusations might just be un-based, a rumour. But atleast some of that has to be true! My opinion is.. well, all the buggers are busy getting a piece of the action, why should anyone take judges to be angels in this place.
So now what is left of justice? For some it is just to get the word out there, that hey! this happened. Media flashes a few camera their way, and bam, justice for them is done, word is out, a few brothers read about it, a few see it on the tv. Moment of silence.
For some, it may just be about getting a police report made. The police goes around, after much references of powerfull people and things, and arrests some boy who had nothing to do with it all, but wrongly captured for the heck of closing one case. Case closed.
Justice might as well be more of a mist now, thin and very hard to see. I wonder is there real justice out there? I doubt it. I just hope my worries are someday proved wrong, and toothfairies do exsist.
I have alot of teeths lying around.

Perhaps befitting the current state of the whole world.

a sunset.

watching a sunset,
is like dawning of a mist on you,
a mist which turns you into a mere lump.

your mind forgets how to think,
your body forgets how to move,
the earth and your feet are suddenly one.

your body gets stiff,
in the hope of stopping the sun from going away,
the eyes are left as a mere camera lens,
capturing the moment,
which you can never witness from any other photo.

you silently pray, like a little kid -
Oh Lord! please let the sun stay..
a few minutes more wont really harm its grace?

but alas! its gone,
and you are left there, staring into the dark,
but then maybe tommorow,
you'll be there yet again, with open arms,
just this time, to welcome it back to your world.

PS: this might be a crappy revisit to the poetic side of myslf, but had the urge to describe the scenic moment of a sunset that i witnessed recently, whose pictures might not do justice to its beauty.

Video Diary # 1 : going coo-coo

Change

I am often reminded, that babies are one hell of a miracle. I mean, how can something soo tiny make one feel all warm and cute and suddenly all responsible? It is said that one of the best feelings in the world is when a baby is asleep in ur arms, or when a baby holds your finger tightly with both of his hands. Its then when you feel like, whoevers child it may be, you are responsible for his well being, that you should protect him with everything you got, that you should stay standing up in an awkward position, which infact is cramping every single muscle of your body, just so the baby sleeping on your shoulder doesnt wake up. And be it just for a few minutes that you are with a baby, you think. you think of how you can make that childs future life better, that how you can be there for that kid whenever he needs any support. You think of ways to make him the luckiest kid there ever was.
But amongst us, are kids that go un-noticed. be it the ones in sheltering homes, the ones in disfunctional schools, to our house keeping staff, or the beggars on the street. People around those kids may have built castles in their mind, just like us, when they met them, but sadly arent fortunate enough to provide em with that. Or those kids on the streets, whose parents just think o em as another source of income from the second they are born, just so that their hard earned money is snatched and spent on some vice their parents have, for example smoking or drinking or..even drugs. Who, if not their parents, are there to think about their future? People who are well off have settled with the idea that fine, if their parents wont think about them, what can we do to change something which is almost every where and, as far as we think, uncure-able. Or even the ever popular and well abused "flawed system", damn if we had a nickle for every time that happened, we might just be giving loans to the states for a change.
But, there is SOMETHING we can do. something that might just change the "flawed system", something that might just circle around it. And its pretty simple, government schools. there are plenty, always near by from our residence, whereever we live. lets give enough credit to the government that they built an ample amount of schools (no matter how hollow it is). How about, we as a society, contribute to the government. and fine for some would be thinking this is prepostorous, that we pay taxes and that should be enough, to think of this boys audacity to tell us to work for the "governement" and that too for "FREE" after all the taxes THEY PAYED. well, screw you then, if you plan on being this hopeless and retarded, you are no different from the "bad" parents i just told about before.
So continuing, cant we all, just contribute a few hours to the nearest possible schools? the schools go on all day, morning and evening. can we, for a few hours, let the party, that we are supposed to have, wait? can the sheesha gathering wait for a couple of hours? or better still, can the parties just stop for ONE day, so that the cash being saved (which i am estimating to be around an average of 400 bucks per head) to be directed to the donation box of some run-down school? hell we can party any day and any time, but can those kids, whose teachers have ran off because they werent paid, can those kids afford a day of not seeing the slightest chance of an education or a brighter future? what is more important, one day of our party, or those kids entire future? we can take a break, they cant.
My sister is working in a semi-government body which regulates such types of schools, and she reminds me that how run down the schools can be. One of my cousin is enrolled in her schools programme that they have to spend a certain amount of hours in such types of school and teach the kids. She also tells me about things in those schools, that make my spine freeze for a second and just wonder.
And lets be honoest about it, this isnt alot to ask for, is it? a few hours away from a cafe, so that (and i might be delusionally optimistic here) more people can get enough education to open more cafes even? or a few hundred bucks not being spent on sheesha just for a day even,for a handfull of smiles from kids whose future may just have been more possible with that cash? Wont these, as some retardedly "hunks" might say, non fun/non cool stuff, make you feel more good and give you a better sleep at night knowing you played your part, and that you played it well?
Isnt it about time already, that we start giving back? Isnt it time already, that we let these kids feel like they are the luckiest ones alive? Are we ready, to bring about a change?
I rest my case here.

People who surround me

Every day, we meet hundreds of people of all kinds. From them, we cautiously select a handful, to be called as our friends. Of the handful we select, some years down the lane we lose them for one reason or the other, some have to leave and some wants to. And although at that time, we do have to let go of them, their memories stay forever, good and the bad alike. I just want to go ahead, grab this opportunity and pen down a little about them, to remind me in the future years what actually made me who I became.
Accepting the rudeness of this fact, I divide my friends list in 3 circles, each one with its own special space, but with world’s difference between all of them.
To start off, the people I met at my tuitions while doing my o/a levels. This group of people I met, included my own teacher, and who ended up calling themselves as “ludhars”, a term whose meaning is unknown to date, just the macho-ism of the word is enough for them. It had a whole bunch of people in it, of which one married off (dada, as we call her) and now is expecting a baby (which am really excited about) from one gem of a husband (aki, like dada calls him), a few others who just disappeared in the thin air, whose name I don’t want to put forward, but still a few stayed. These few, I had lost touch off, appeared in the starting of the year 2009, just capturing all of my working day’s evening hours, Sunday being an off day thanks to the driver of this person, who has to be one of the most wonderful person I have ever come across, who has the painful responsibility to pick and drop a fool like me every day, really appreciate whatever she has done for me. With this person along with “dada” and her husband, I have to admit, I have done the craziest of things. From riding a horse and a camel for the first time in at least 10 years, to listening to these weird old songs at the highest volume which made me tone-deaf for an easy 24 hours, to sitting in a parlor listening to this whining off a song watching the person get a blow-dry, to stealing flowers from garden of different houses. Good times, good stuff. I have to also mention my mentor and my teacher, who has been the most “chilled” teacher to be around, smoking during his classes, drifting in his car at midnight in front of an ice cream parlor after sitting at the open rooftop of a hotel on a seriously chilly night, with no warm clothes on, or just sitting admiring the new soft sofa in his office while sitting on a rug on the floor in the hopes that we leave no marks on the sofa. Boss, as I call him, has seriously been the single reason for my interest in accounts, the sole reason I ended up going into ACCA. I just simply adore these people, all of them, without them my evenings will be pathetic, which I had to unfortunately bear a couple of days back due to some issues.
This group, recently joined by few cadets from the northern side of Pakistan, have breathed a more exciting and weird life into the group. I have my fair share of funny memories with them, one which happened today only, which I might just never forget. These 2 cadets, and I, were rudely left stranded on the streets, by our ‘transporter (please don’t kill me for this=p)”. But, seizing the moment, and trying to show that we don’t really mind sitting on the street divider (which we did!), we took a few pictures, adored the scenery ahead of us and saying a few weird movie dialogues about being left alone and stuff. Sadly, my data cables fried, so won’t be able to put them up.
Another addition to this group has to be my friend since class 6. Really fun to be around, I have known her for decades, although sharing more troubled memories than good ones, still, her addition has been a good experience in its own.

The other group, which spun off and joined another, started when I joined this place “lecole”, at the start of my ACCA. That time gave me 2 friends, out of which one I am not so much in touch with, but our ways keep crossing each other and we happen to know about each others’ basic routines. The other one is who I came to call as a really close friend of mine(H.A.S), and ignoring the tiny differences about us, his life’s experiences are carbon copied to mine. We both lost our serious relationships at the same time; we have had the same problems over the years, and we both share the same thoughts on major of things, especially our love for our beloved city, Karachi. He has launched his own business a few weeks back, and I wish him well. From this same person, I ended up getting into another group. A group which amazes me. One can fail to explain how intellectual yet fun these guys can be. Being very successful in their own fields, I came in contact with them just a few months back, and have been literally amazed by their discussions. It makes me really happy and proud to see, people of their words are still alive, people with principles and a surprising level of respect for every human being, and that I know them. It is magic, when around them, discussing about all kinds of things, and this makes the time fly. The flying time has been a problem, because late home coming is really not my dad’s thing, and has landed me in a few messy situations. But I think it’s worth it, u give when u get.

The last, but equally important, is the group who am mostly in touch with my cell or my msn. Out of this, a few live countries away, while the rest being just streets down, yet with no physical interaction, and whose faces I may have clearly forgotten and vice versa. This includes 2 of my oldest friends, “dany boy” who I know ever since I joined my prep classes, and the other, “aunti” as I call her, who I’ve known since class 8. Dany boy has been around ever since I can remember, and we somehow are always in touch, and know almost all there is to know about each others’ lives. He lives a few blocks away, yet we fail to meet as much as we could, thanks to our schedules and commitments. The other, aunti, also living a few blocks away, has known me for ages now. She too, knows everything there is to know, thanks to being constantly in touch through SMS every single day. Not a day has passed when we haven’t been just yapping about the most useless of the stuffs to each other.
This other person, who as well, was with me in class 8, had disappeared when changing her country. But, thanks to facebook, we got back in touch around end 2008, and ended up being, probably, the most retarded of the people on net. We have crapped about any and every famous personality, and made the lamest jokes ever, and laughed loud enough to even make the neighbors shout! It’s never boring talking to her, and I mean NEVER.
Other then these, I have also managed not to lose touch with the people I grew up with, or even went out with, who had been really important to me and who I might never be able forget no matter what, no matter how.
These all are the people, whose faces I might have forgotten and whose birthday dates I may never remember had there been no facebook/orkut reminders, I respect them all, and they have played their own parts in making me who I am today, and have played it rather well.

This ends my tiny list of the close friends and people who surround them. These are people I am ready to take a bullet for, happily, and knowing them, hopefully, is something I’ll never regret to the date I live, for one thing is sure, I’ll never be able to forget any of them.
Once again, shout out to all the friends, thanks a ton, something I don’t really say as much as I should. And sorry if I have left anyone’s names or nicks, it is kind of late at night right now and my mind is rather tired from an exhausting day. So,Peace!
Syed Muhammad Raheel Nabi Shah.

Social Circus

Everyday we curse our country and its so called "system", a word which even a 5 year old can talk about. Many geniuses say that all it takes is one person to solve the entire thing. The person, me. If i change myself things will become all favourable. Its me who ll have to change, not them, not anyone else. And if i dont change, than ladies and gentlemen, we are stuck with the same corrupt environment. We say knowing that its highly impossible, i mean, seriously, if i change, how will things change for others? people will do what they want, no matter what, no mater what i become. It ll take alot of courage to accept that yes, we are back to the jungle rule, where the one with the power is the law.
Every single day we are waiting at the signal, waiting hours at each. It just opens for 15 seconds, the average time that is required to wake up the people in the front line with our deafening horns. Its green, 15 seconds later all the cars ahead of us leave, except ours. Thus we are forced to break signals, taking ourselves as james bond, gunning our rides to the other end in less than a second, dodging the trafic coming right at us like angry bulls. We still break the signal, showing our asses to the others, to the standing policemen, to the whole "system". But well, our glory is short lived, as some policeman comes infront of our car with his fat belly and his slick jutt tone, and we know its time to feed the hungry beast with some colored paper, which we consider as great value, yet it takes only a mere cent to make.
Anyways, leaving this thought aside, we are stuck on the middle of a road, stuck with a cow with paper horns which will turn into flowers as soon as we flash them. The geniuses sitting on our heads, have a very simple approach to this: ask for the proper ticket. Oh my, how could i have missed that? To be responsible, i have to take the proper ticket, and avoid the monster called "bribe".
So i try this, i try asking for a proper ticket, like a responsible citizen whose changing his life so that things get easier for others, lovely. I run a red light, get caught, ask for a ticket. And what a lovely response i get: lets not get into the paper works, we are brothers, i wouldnt like to see you standing in the line in some bank. How sweet! But sadly it just means its flashing time again. But once again, my civil duty hits me, and i argue that i really want a ticket. He gives me one, 900 bucks for running a red light. Good enough, i deserve this. But that is not enough for the cow, who has suddenly turned nasty. He demands paper(money), "demands" it. He has my license, and wont even give me my ticket, without which i cant have my license back. So back to the monster it is. I bribed a cop to GIVE ME A TICKET!! Brilliant.
So maybe it is not only me who has to change. maybe it is time to be more sensible and accept, that yes, we all have to change. Getting a ticket is not all that is required, it is more than that, much more than that. It is about time that we stop pointing fingers at everything, and start pointing at things which really pisses us off: us. We cant change anything, when we think the smallest of the things, like signals, are unfair. And no, a single "leader" wont be able to change anything for us. We need an army of leaders, ruthless leaders, like Fidel Castro, like Che Guevara, in short: we need the worst to fix us up, and we need a whole lot of them, fast.